Finally, I have been wanting to write since yesterday. So first and foremost, the reason that set off the process for wanting to blog. I joined swimming guys! I am so excited! When I came back yesterday from the swimming class I was jumping with excitement and energy. And there was no one home to bump it off to.
Part of the reason I want to learn swimming is the paradox I am in, that "I love to be in and around water, but I am also afraid of water". So, I want to get over my fear of water, so I can do the things that I do not do now because I have this abnormally huge fear of getting drowned. It's also funny how I have no fear in some situations and a lot of fear in other. For example, when we went rafting in Rishikesh, a couple of years ago, I was a little afraid but got pretty comfortable in a little while. And during that trip when we stopped by a small rocky area, the instructor announced that we are taking a break and pulled the raft on the side. Then we climbed up to a rock that was ~20-25 feet above the river and asked us if we would like to jump into the river from there. I jumped. Of course with the lifejacket on but at that time I did not even know how to float or paddle a little in water. But I was able to do that. And I was the first one in the group to do it. I am also comfortable, paddling, kayaking, cannoeing (havent done all, but really I would not be fearful trying them). Also, done parasailing above a huge water body and all is a great experience.
But there are two instances when I felt immense fear was when we got into a katamaran boat into the Indian ocean with just me and a friend and the boatman planned to row us into the deeper side of the ocean. We were supposed to have an ocean ride. He was a fisherman and this was in Kerala. But within ~300-400 feet into the ocean, I showed such an abnormal and fearful response that we came back. I did something similar when I and friends tried to take a Jet Ski in Lake Tahoe. We paid $100 for the 1 hour ride where we rented the boat and again within the same range of water, I forced everyone to come back to the beach. That was like a 5-10 min ride and we of course did not even ask for half a refund or something from them. On introspection and analysis, I think I am afraid to be in a large water body like an ocean. It suddenly makes me feel very miniscule and trivial; completely at the mercy of the vast huge universe of water that could engulf me any time. And truly, arent we all so very small in this entire existence? We must be soooooooo very illusioned.
Anyways let me not philosophise much and get back to the simple life. Well,I did learn a little bit of floating in 3-4 feet water in Delhi, before coming to US. But, that was two years ago. I probably was the oldest person learning swimming there. It was actually a Kendriya Vidyalaya whose swimming pool was open during summer for all. So, it was mostly dominated by kids in the age group 6 to 12 years and then some teens and there were a handful of youngsters in their early twenties. And here the instructor would ask us to do something and there they would do it in the first go. Like the first day I went to that pool, the instructor asked me to wade across the water and come to the other side. I was paralyzed immediately. Wade through the water? The closest I had come to water was standing in a stream with less than knee deep water or maximum sitting on a boat and throwing water at each other. And now he asks me to wade through the 3-4 feet deep water. Frankly speaking I did not know before this that it is actually possible to walk through water and whatever I saw in those movies I thought were great stunts and all. Seriously! But once he showed me how to do it, I found it really easy and did it fine the very first time. So, that was my first victory with water.
The second time I felt mentally challenged was when I was asked to dip my head inside water and breathe out. I thought I was going to die immediately. I knew people could easily do that, but I felt I would die of lack of breath. And then when I tried it a couple of times, I started loving it, because it is so much fun. I specially love the bubbles that form and the noise they make when you breathe out into water. So, I would sit in the 3 feet deep water and do that in and out. The next challenge that completely unnerved me was learning to float. The common problem with all of these challenges are that we do not believe it is possible. My instructor would repeated tell me "Just let yourself go, and you WILL float" and I just could not do that for a while. I feared I would go down into the water. But the moment you do that, victory is smiling at you again.
It is a huge learning experience. The fact that we often hang on to our beliefs so hard, that we are often not willing to try new things out. And in just a moment, you see a new wide horizon of possibilities. A lot to learn from. I think am a really slow learner though. Specially in any sports. Anyways, back to the story. So the little kids there who would almost accomplish everything the instructor asked them to do in one go, would often be found whispering amongst themselves while looking sheepishly at me, "In didi ko nahin aata" (This didi is not able to do it). And then there was one of those, 9-10 years old, smart confident kid. He came up to me and said, "Dekho didi, aise karna hai" (See didi, this is how you do it). And then he jumped into the water and swayed to the other end. I nodded and then to justify myself I added, "You know actually I joined just two days before, so I don't know how to do it yet, I will learn in a little more time, thank you". To this he proudly added, "Didi, I also joined 2 days ago". I turned slight pink for a few seconds but then I quickly regained my brown self back. I instantly remembered the truth in the saying Child is the father of man.
Will detail about my current swimming class later (which is the reason I started writing *smile*) as this is already a big blog.
Part of the reason I want to learn swimming is the paradox I am in, that "I love to be in and around water, but I am also afraid of water". So, I want to get over my fear of water, so I can do the things that I do not do now because I have this abnormally huge fear of getting drowned. It's also funny how I have no fear in some situations and a lot of fear in other. For example, when we went rafting in Rishikesh, a couple of years ago, I was a little afraid but got pretty comfortable in a little while. And during that trip when we stopped by a small rocky area, the instructor announced that we are taking a break and pulled the raft on the side. Then we climbed up to a rock that was ~20-25 feet above the river and asked us if we would like to jump into the river from there. I jumped. Of course with the lifejacket on but at that time I did not even know how to float or paddle a little in water. But I was able to do that. And I was the first one in the group to do it. I am also comfortable, paddling, kayaking, cannoeing (havent done all, but really I would not be fearful trying them). Also, done parasailing above a huge water body and all is a great experience.
But there are two instances when I felt immense fear was when we got into a katamaran boat into the Indian ocean with just me and a friend and the boatman planned to row us into the deeper side of the ocean. We were supposed to have an ocean ride. He was a fisherman and this was in Kerala. But within ~300-400 feet into the ocean, I showed such an abnormal and fearful response that we came back. I did something similar when I and friends tried to take a Jet Ski in Lake Tahoe. We paid $100 for the 1 hour ride where we rented the boat and again within the same range of water, I forced everyone to come back to the beach. That was like a 5-10 min ride and we of course did not even ask for half a refund or something from them. On introspection and analysis, I think I am afraid to be in a large water body like an ocean. It suddenly makes me feel very miniscule and trivial; completely at the mercy of the vast huge universe of water that could engulf me any time. And truly, arent we all so very small in this entire existence? We must be soooooooo very illusioned.
Anyways let me not philosophise much and get back to the simple life. Well,I did learn a little bit of floating in 3-4 feet water in Delhi, before coming to US. But, that was two years ago. I probably was the oldest person learning swimming there. It was actually a Kendriya Vidyalaya whose swimming pool was open during summer for all. So, it was mostly dominated by kids in the age group 6 to 12 years and then some teens and there were a handful of youngsters in their early twenties. And here the instructor would ask us to do something and there they would do it in the first go. Like the first day I went to that pool, the instructor asked me to wade across the water and come to the other side. I was paralyzed immediately. Wade through the water? The closest I had come to water was standing in a stream with less than knee deep water or maximum sitting on a boat and throwing water at each other. And now he asks me to wade through the 3-4 feet deep water. Frankly speaking I did not know before this that it is actually possible to walk through water and whatever I saw in those movies I thought were great stunts and all. Seriously! But once he showed me how to do it, I found it really easy and did it fine the very first time. So, that was my first victory with water.
The second time I felt mentally challenged was when I was asked to dip my head inside water and breathe out. I thought I was going to die immediately. I knew people could easily do that, but I felt I would die of lack of breath. And then when I tried it a couple of times, I started loving it, because it is so much fun. I specially love the bubbles that form and the noise they make when you breathe out into water. So, I would sit in the 3 feet deep water and do that in and out. The next challenge that completely unnerved me was learning to float. The common problem with all of these challenges are that we do not believe it is possible. My instructor would repeated tell me "Just let yourself go, and you WILL float" and I just could not do that for a while. I feared I would go down into the water. But the moment you do that, victory is smiling at you again.
It is a huge learning experience. The fact that we often hang on to our beliefs so hard, that we are often not willing to try new things out. And in just a moment, you see a new wide horizon of possibilities. A lot to learn from. I think am a really slow learner though. Specially in any sports. Anyways, back to the story. So the little kids there who would almost accomplish everything the instructor asked them to do in one go, would often be found whispering amongst themselves while looking sheepishly at me, "In didi ko nahin aata" (This didi is not able to do it). And then there was one of those, 9-10 years old, smart confident kid. He came up to me and said, "Dekho didi, aise karna hai" (See didi, this is how you do it). And then he jumped into the water and swayed to the other end. I nodded and then to justify myself I added, "You know actually I joined just two days before, so I don't know how to do it yet, I will learn in a little more time, thank you". To this he proudly added, "Didi, I also joined 2 days ago". I turned slight pink for a few seconds but then I quickly regained my brown self back. I instantly remembered the truth in the saying Child is the father of man.Will detail about my current swimming class later (which is the reason I started writing *smile*) as this is already a big blog.
